*
Yeah, i said peanuts!
.
Ok, another week, another day-times savings period and (almost) another night are over. And here am i, sleepless.
.
You know how it goes, right? You just can't sleep until you get it off your chest. You can't sleep because you are about to remember that very thing.. that very thing you had forgotton to remember. The most important thing. The last piece to the puzzle. You are on the verge of an epifany. And its 3 am. So you can't sleep. So you don't sleep.
...
An epiphany that never happens.
.
"Let's go be happy in front of miserable people!"
from http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/
.Ok, another week, another day-times savings period and (almost) another night are over. And here am i, sleepless.
.
You know how it goes, right? You just can't sleep until you get it off your chest. You can't sleep because you are about to remember that very thing.. that very thing you had forgotton to remember. The most important thing. The last piece to the puzzle. You are on the verge of an epifany. And its 3 am. So you can't sleep. So you don't sleep.
...
An epiphany that never happens.
.
"Let's go be happy in front of miserable people!"
.
i want to go somewhere fun and watch people today. Interesting people. With conversations educational enough to overhear. And i want to tattoo the answer. Because i have the answer...
So, what's the answer? 42. Well, what did you expect with a question like that?
*
*
So then i started to wonder, what's with the accent? i mean, my English is from particularly nowhere. And that is pretty awkward.
.
(There is one more video cooking in my head so keep tuned because i'll shoot it soon enough. And this one will be even more educational.)
.
I really need to get an international credit card. So then i can buy this and this for my self-improvement and won't feel so frustrated. Le sigh. Anyone got any good reading material about burlesque to e-mail me? NOTHING is as frustrating as the feeling i have hit a wall.
.
The next Luxuria is coming up. The Mister talked to me about burlesque yesterday. He isn't all for my eagerness to be a better dancer. To invest in this and to go for it. He said i am too old to go after it. That was kind of cruel, even if He didn't mean for it to be. i really wish to be a better dancer, as i wish to be a better person. i hate average. Just OK is not OK.
.
Sure, i will pursue other things. i AM. Fashion designing, writing, going back to school. But this is big for me too. Guess that at least i can look into taking a stage makeup workshop next Sunday. Maybe.
.
Anyway, speaking of burlesque...
my friend
Ops. Next time it will be on purpose.
*
*
Another week over. My memory sucks. I need my vitamins (and anti-inflammatory meds so this pain will ease). Today was busy. i had to make bento because otherwise i wouldn't eat. So i ate healthy. For a change.
.
Yesterday was lazy. He was home. i did my chores, and had that meeting. Then we ate at the mall. We cuddled, He went out. i cooked for four hours. We went out.
.
Thursday i did a lot of chores. Then i worked. And baked His cheesecake. After that i went to dance class. 3 hours of dance class. He bought a scooter.
.
Wednesday i did my chores in the morning. Then went to my sewing class. i finished hurting my arm carrying that big bag. i worked and arrived home late.
.
Monday and Tuesday i felt bad. Sick. But then i got better.
...
:
So this week i have (but not exactly in this order):
- started ballet lessons. And actually enjoyed them. A lot.
- been a good housewife. Things are tidy and in place and there are muffins on the kitchen counter.
- started sewing masculine underwear in class. i wish female were as easy.
- made a video. But you have already seen it.
- cooked. a lot. And probably regained the weight i had lost from being sick.
- made my first bento.
- did my nails. purple.
- had sex. Once. But it was great.
- had a meeting.
- not been on my Mans new bike. Although He bought me a helmet.
- not worn my corset enough
- recovered from a stomach flu
- not eaten any chocolate (1 week without chocolate, but not without sweets - i'm going for healthier treats these days)
- made my Man a cheesecake for Valentines
- made lists
- seen naked girls online
- read a lot of food porn
- did almost all the laundry
- ate healthy foods
- got high on pain killers
*
*
Guess that's it. The reason i'm probably feeling this restless is because i have absolutely no prospects. At all.
.
All i want is to do something that matters. And if i dance in it i would be extra happy.
.
Meanwhile, i'll keep on dreaming.
*
*
Mood: Melancholic and hopeless
Now playing: The Fratellis (and they are fun to dance to, too).
*
Its 5 am. i give up, i just can't fall asleep. (Ever had the sensation there is a hand in your chest squishing your heart as if it were a honeycomb? i get that all the time. And it hurts). i'll go for a walk when the sun comes up. It should do me some good.
*
i want to go somewhere fun and watch people today. Interesting people. With conversations educational enough to overhear. And i want to tattoo the answer. Because i have the answer...
So, what's the answer? 42. Well, what did you expect with a question like that?
*
*
So then i started to wonder, what's with the accent? i mean, my English is from particularly nowhere. And that is pretty awkward.
.(There is one more video cooking in my head so keep tuned because i'll shoot it soon enough. And this one will be even more educational.)
.
I really need to get an international credit card. So then i can buy this and this for my self-improvement and won't feel so frustrated. Le sigh. Anyone got any good reading material about burlesque to e-mail me? NOTHING is as frustrating as the feeling i have hit a wall.
.
The next Luxuria is coming up. The Mister talked to me about burlesque yesterday. He isn't all for my eagerness to be a better dancer. To invest in this and to go for it. He said i am too old to go after it. That was kind of cruel, even if He didn't mean for it to be. i really wish to be a better dancer, as i wish to be a better person. i hate average. Just OK is not OK.
.
Sure, i will pursue other things. i AM. Fashion designing, writing, going back to school. But this is big for me too. Guess that at least i can look into taking a stage makeup workshop next Sunday. Maybe.
.
Anyway, speaking of burlesque...
my friend
Ops. Next time it will be on purpose.*
*
Another week over. My memory sucks. I need my vitamins (and anti-inflammatory meds so this pain will ease). Today was busy. i had to make bento because otherwise i wouldn't eat. So i ate healthy. For a change.
.
Yesterday was lazy. He was home. i did my chores, and had that meeting. Then we ate at the mall. We cuddled, He went out. i cooked for four hours. We went out.
.
Thursday i did a lot of chores. Then i worked. And baked His cheesecake. After that i went to dance class. 3 hours of dance class. He bought a scooter.
.
Wednesday i did my chores in the morning. Then went to my sewing class. i finished hurting my arm carrying that big bag. i worked and arrived home late.
.
Monday and Tuesday i felt bad. Sick. But then i got better.
...
:So this week i have (but not exactly in this order):
- started ballet lessons. And actually enjoyed them. A lot.
- been a good housewife. Things are tidy and in place and there are muffins on the kitchen counter.
- started sewing masculine underwear in class. i wish female were as easy.
- made a video. But you have already seen it.
- cooked. a lot. And probably regained the weight i had lost from being sick.
- made my first bento.
- did my nails. purple.
- had sex. Once. But it was great.
- had a meeting.
- not been on my Mans new bike. Although He bought me a helmet.
- not worn my corset enough
- recovered from a stomach flu
- not eaten any chocolate (1 week without chocolate, but not without sweets - i'm going for healthier treats these days)
- made my Man a cheesecake for Valentines
- made lists
- seen naked girls online
- read a lot of food porn
- did almost all the laundry
- ate healthy foods
- got high on pain killers
*
*
Guess that's it. The reason i'm probably feeling this restless is because i have absolutely no prospects. At all.
.
All i want is to do something that matters. And if i dance in it i would be extra happy.
.
Meanwhile, i'll keep on dreaming.
*
*
Mood: Melancholic and hopeless
Now playing: The Fratellis (and they are fun to dance to, too).
*
Its 5 am. i give up, i just can't fall asleep. (Ever had the sensation there is a hand in your chest squishing your heart as if it were a honeycomb? i get that all the time. And it hurts). i'll go for a walk when the sun comes up. It should do me some good.
*
No comments:
Post a Comment